I have been doing some teaching at an English school this week. There are a lot of Saudi Arabians studying at this school, and they are a source of constant fascination. Of course, I have only come into contact with Saudis who travel, who may be very different from the Saudis who stay at home. But even so...
What springs to your mind when you think of Saudis? I have to admit that my preconceived ideas were: religion controlling every aspect of life, to an almost debilitating degree, distant men who wouldn't dream of looking a woman in the eye, and much less of talking to her, meek, silent women hidden in swathes of black cloth, and the necessity of constantly treading on eggshells to avoid causing any offence.
Since then, all the Saudis I have come across in my classes have been gracious, pleasant, well-mannered and - here's what opened my eyes – exceedingly tolerant and unjudgemental. If I were from a country where women couldn't leave the house unless they were covered from head to toe and accompanied by a male relative, I am sure I would find it shocking and unacceptable to find myself studying with both men and women - sitting next to each other - and a female teacher, who is comparatively skimpily dressed.
But in the classroom, the men show no sign of being disturbed by having to, in effect, take orders from a woman (one who is considerably younger than many of them and who doesn't even cover her head). They are extremely respectful and cheerful, and if you didn't know, you would never guess that they were from a country where women are so deferent to men. The younger ones in particular are remarkably laid-back and friendly towards the (non-Arab) girls in the class, chatting to them and even touching them.
Women in Saudi Arabia, I believe, all wear black abayas and niqabs (so just their eyes show) when they go out in public. But I have never seen any of the students at the school here wearing them. The women all cover up, but they wear pretty tops, jeans, trainers, and brightly coloured scarves. I have had two students who covered their faces, but even they were wearing bright colours. (It is a bit unsettling, incidentally, to talk to someone wearing a niqab if you are not used to it. It is like talking to someone holding their hand in front of their mouth. You fight the urge to say, “Stop covering your mouth! I can’t hear what you are saying!”)
The other thing that surprised me about the women is how educated so many of them are. Many of them have been to university, and they are doctors, university lecturers, managers, or other professionals. Apparently, 58% of college students in Saudi Arabia are women (although they are barred from certain subjects, such as engineering, journalism and architecture, and account for only 14% of the workforce).
But one incident in class today did make me wonder if, behind the scenes, Saudi Arabia is being run not so much by the princes of the House of Saud as by their mothers. The topic of the lesson was phones and phone calls, and one lanky, melodramatic man with an explosive smile threw his hands in the air and spluttered, “Every day, my mother call me! She say, ‘What you doing?’ I say, ‘I busy!’ She say, ‘Come here!’ And I put phone and I go here.” His shoulders fell, in a gesture of resignation. “My mother,” he declared, drawing his finger firmly across the desk, “she red line!”
This man, I should mention, was 40 years old.
Most interesting. Cape Town also has a very large Muslim community but I think like the Jewish community, there are differing degrees of religiousness. There were only a couple of Muslim girls, when I was at highschool, who wore special floor length uniform dresses and covered their heads.
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